Andrew's Story
My name is Andrew. I'm 36 and one of four boys. As a child my life was quite traumatic. When I was six years old my mother abandoned us by placing all four of us on a plane to Holland where my alcoholic father was working on the building sites. She didn't come with us as the window cleaner had taken her heart. My dad, a carpenter, placed us all in schools which we stayed in for two years. My mother came to Holland and begged my father to come back to England so they could get back together and work things out. But on our arrival my father was given divorce papers. We moved in with my Nan for about a year. I went to school and had hand me downs from my two brothers. These were scruffy and I was bullied by all the children in my year. When I left school at sixteen my father told me to leave our house and stand on my own two feet. I was taken in by an ex-girl friend of my fathers and I got a job as a lifeguard. I found a friend, place to shut off and get away from everything which was a fruit machine arcade. After three years as a lifeguard I was sacked for poor attendance due to fruit machines. But in those three years I had met a girl called Sara. Sara got pregnant and we moved into North Road Hostel. Carlie my daughter was born and we moved to Jessop Road. Sara became pregnant and when Chris was born in the flat at Jessop Road I went to the Council and we got a three bedroom house in Bedwell. All the time I was still playing the fruit machines. Our relationship broke down due to my gambling addiction and my girlfriend found a new lover. Yet again I felt abandoned by a woman. I made the biggest decision in my life, to leave, sign the house over, and never to interfere in Carlie and Chris's upbringing so they could be brought up in a family which is stable, which it still is today.
I stayed single for eight years. I played the fruit machines and accounted that I had put £122,000 in them over eight years. I moved around a lot in this time and didn't have any relationships. In 2001 I met Mary. She was different, compassionate and caring. I fell in love and we got married. My addiction had become much less and I seemed to be overcoming my problem. After six months marriage Mary returned from work and said she had met a man and had feelings for him and as she had feelings for him she could not have feelings for me. Our marriage ended. I moved out. I lived in my car for 3 months, drunk excessively, got addicted to drugs and my gambling addiction came back. After breaking down and going to my doctors I was referred to an addiction clinic. I attended the clinic for about a month then they referred me to the Haven. The Haven saved my life. I'm still a resident at the Haven and still attend the addiction clinic today. I believe if it wasn't for these two places handed to me by God I would not be alive today.